life and death

With new life there comes death. Happy times bring sadness. I dont know how to deal with the loss that happened to me personaly 4 years ago today. I lost a son before he had a chance to even begin his life it was over it haunts me to this day what could i have done different if i stopped my meds for parkinsons would that have saved him. Gods plans are greater than mine and i have to have faith and believe in what he has in store for me . I was only 20 weeks pregnant but was told it was a boy and i named him Samuel Richard, a few days later i lost him. i have not gotten over this and pray it gets easier to deal with but he will always be a part of my and a piece of me is missing. i never got to hold him never got to say goodbye maybe this is why its so hard.

resolutions

Ok i have heard everyone's resolutions for the new year, i never make them because i feel that they are mostly never kept anyways so why make them. So here i go im going to make 5 of which i would like to do this year sit back and have a good laugh.

1. Be a better mom always listen and play more.
2. Read my Bible more
3. Help others in need my # 1 in this area is people with parkinsons
4. loose weight
5. quit smoking

Brohters Graduation

I am so proud of my brother. He is a husband of a wonderful woman, a father of 3 beautiful children ty sarah, and jacob. The most impressive part of my brother is that on top of a full time job he is also a preacher at Hope Freewill Baptist Church, and if that is not enough he has put his self through school he just graduated with his masters in counseling. I am truly impressed he is such an inspiration to me. I just want him to know im so proud of him.

LIFE

Sometimes i wonder what is my purpose here in this world. There are so many confusing things that i dont understand. 1. abortion i know this is a very sensitive subject but here is my stand ....I DO NOT BELIEVE UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE IN ABORTION. I believe that for some reason or another that the baby was created for some reason BY GOD. I dont see how someone could kill an innocent child for their own selfish reasons. Children are the most precious thing in this world if you dont think you could raise the child then their are people who cant have children who would love to adopt. I would love another child myself but it is impossible for me, adoption isnt an option for me either not until there is a cure for parkinson's. My kids are the most important things in this world to me (WELL THE SECOND THE MOST IMPORTANT IS JESUS CHRIST) but you know what i mean they are why i do the things i do to help find a cure for parkinson's because i never want them to hear the words i heard 4 years ago. I put all my faith in My Lord and Saviour and know that He will bring me through whatever trials i am dealt with here in this world. And believe me i have had my fair share and will take on more so my kids don't have to i will do anything to help them and keep them safe.
I guess i have gone on enough for now hopefull the girls will be willing to take a nap. lol i doubt it though

here's what he says what an outlook on life INSPIRATION

Ten years after shocking the world with the announcement that he has Parkinson's, Michael J. Fox is aggressively fighting the disease – and says he still sees a bright future ahead.

"Based on how I feel now," the star tells PEOPLE in its new issue, "I'll be okay for at least 10 more years."

Since leaving Spin City in 2000 – two years after revealing his Parkinson's diagnosis on the cover of PEOPLE magazine – Fox, 47, has been focused on raising his four kids with wife Tracy Pollan, 48, and helping The Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson's Research pour $140 million into fighting the disease.

Fox has found a successful combination of medications to keep his symptoms under control. But, he says, the progression of the disease is unavoidable, and "at some point every day" he enters a state of what doctors call "bradykinesia" – in which his arms hang heavy at his side.

But the actor tells PEOPLE he doesn't want anyone feeling sorry for him. In fact, Fox says, having Parkinson's "is part of an amazing life." And it's not "an otherwise amazing life," he clarifies. "It's part of what makes my life amazing."

HERO INSPIRATION

This man shows that life goes on even though you have parkinsons. But look in his eyes the sparkle that once was there the one i saw in washington dc 2 years ago when i met him and hugged him after a speech given on parkinsons disease i hate that parkinsons can rob someone of their smile and sparkle its not bad enough that you have to live with the bradykensia rigidity and dsykenesia all of this is bad but the loss of your smile and sparkle in your eye nothing should ever take that away

Please help us find a cure

THE GIFT OF LIFE

The one thing that i ever did that made me feel like i was making a difference was donating blood. I am 1 pint shy of 5 gallons this makes me so sad and so upset and frustrated because due to my heart surgery i am not eligible to donate again until june of 2009. I know needles scare some people and honestly i dont like them either but somehow knowing i was helping someone else made it all worth the pain or nervousness. i have known people personally who's lives were saved by people who donated blood and that made it even more important to me. and to know that i am willing and wanting to donate and cant and knowing there are people who can and wont just upsets me.